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... The VP's Four-Letter Song |
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The Four-Letter Song
Lyrics and Music by Mr. DMockCrazy, unCopyright (u) 2004
Dedicated in dishonor of Vice President Dick Chainsaw, who had a "bad day" at the office.
Dedicated in honor of Senator Patrick Leahy who was a "good sport" about the whole thing!
To paraphrase Dick Chainsaw's followup comments,..."I'm glad I wrote this song. It made me feel good".
NEW VERSE for 2/11/2006: Based on the VP Dick Chainsaw Quail Hunting Incident in Texas on Saturday February 11, 2006.
Vice President Chainsaw shot and injured Harry Whittington, a 78-year-old Texas attorney (OUCH).
An L.A. Times article concluded with Sen. Patrick J. Leahy (D-Vt.),
who was once on the receiving end of a vice presidential obscenity on the floor of the Senate, saying:
"In retrospect, it looks like I got off easy."
Also, check out this video game depicting the famous quail hunt.
How's that for a Weapon of Mass Incompetence?
NEW VERSE:
| C | Em/b |
In Texas, the Vice President was hunting quail.
| F/a | D9/f# G |
He shot Harry Whittington, but posted no bail.
| C | Edim7 |
But he can't find Bin Laden, on that he failed.
| G | F | C | Am/c | C | G |...
"Why don't you go and f-f-f-FIRE yourself?"
ORIGINAL SONG FOLLOWS:
INTRO: | C | Em/b | F/a | D9/f# G |...
Adim7 G/b | E | Am |
As I read the newspaper the other day,
| E | Am |
I saw four little hyphens across the page.
| Dm | Edim7 |
Like a crossword puzzle, had to figure it out.
| G | F | C | Am/c | C | G |
I scratched my head, sayin', "What's that all about?"
| C | Em/b |
VERSE: The Vice President, tryin' to get a vote,
| F/a | D9/f# G |
Used a four-letter word, and he said, quote:
| C | Edim7 |
"If you're hungry, well, just don't rock the boat."
| G | F | C | Am/c | C | G |
"Why don't you go and f-f-f-FEED yourself?"
| C | Em/b |
VERSE: "You don't have 40 acres? How 'bout 40 feet?"
| F/a | D9/f# G |
"You can plant a little garden right next to the street."
| C | Edim7 |
"You can plant some seeds, you'll have somethin' to eat."
| G | F | C | Am/c | C | G |...
"Why don't you go and f-f-f-FARM yourself?"
Adim7 G/b | E | Am |
CHORUS: You can pull the wool over some people's eyes.
| E | Am |
You can even tell 'em some little white lies.
| Dm | Edim7 |
But you can't super-size those big black lies.
| G | F | C | Am/c | C | G |...
Why don't you go and f-f-f-FOOL yourself?
| C | Em/b |
VERSE: "Gas prices goin' up, better fill your tank."
| F/a | D9/f# G |
"Halliburton's gouging, take that to the bank."
| C | Edim7 |
"If you own some stock, you have Dick to thank."
| G | F | C | Am/c | C | G |...
"Why don't you go and f-f-f-FUEL yourself?"
| C | Em/b |
VERSE: "There is no free lunch, and nothin' is free."
| F/a | D9/f# G |
"All men are equal, all men 'should' be free."
| C | Edim7 |
"But we got deficits; can't install democracy".
| G | F | C | Am/c | C | G |...
"Why don't you go and f-f-f-FREE yourself?"
Cdim7 D#7 | G#m | C#m |
BRIDGE: You can (BLEEP) some people, some of the time.
| F#7 | Adim7 |...
But you can't (BLEEP) the people ALL of the time.
Adim7 G/b | E | Am |
CHORUS: You can pull the wool over some people's eyes.
| E | Am |
You can even tell 'em some little white lies.
| Dm | Edim7 |
But you can't super-size those big black lies.
| G | F | C | Am/c | C | G |...
Why don't you go and f-f-f-FOOL yourself?
| C | Em/b |
VERSE: "The Homeland Security spinnin' wheel."
| F/a | D9/f# G |
"The color of the day is ... How do you feel?"
| C | Edim7 |
"Who do you trust? What is real?"
| G | F | C | Am/c | C | G |...
"Why don't you go and f-f-f-FEAR yourself?"
| C | Em/b |
VERSE: "The President thinks that he's the boss."
| F/a | D9/f# G |
"But I'm pullin' strings, like dental floss."
| C | Edim7 |
"We got global positioning, in case he get's lost."
| G | F | C | Am/c | C | G |...
"Why don't you go and f-f-f-FIND yourself?"
CHORUS (Same as above).
ENDING:
| G | F | C | Am/c |...
Why don't you go and f-f-f-FOOL yourself? (2x)
| G | F | C | Am/c |...
You ain't gonna get f-f-f-FOUR more years? (2x)
| G | F | C | Am/c |...
Why don't you go and repeat and f-f-f-FADE? (as necessary)
Lyrics and Music by Mr. DMockCrazy, unCopyright (u) 2004
Special Thanks:
Alternative 4-letter words inspired by that other famous 4-letter word
used by Dick Chainsaw. The (BLEEPs) provided courtesy of FCC Censors.
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